Designer Moms

I'm a mom. I'm not savvy, posh, haute, chic or any other adjective trying to make me feel sophisticated. How can I feel sophisticated with a tissue in my pocket covered in boogers? I don't wear high heels or fancy scarfs or even expensive sunglasses. I wear jeans. Just jeans everyday. I only go to the grocery store, Home Depot or on fancy days,
Petsmart. I wear what makes me feel comfortable because it's hard to play dress up, fight bad guys, or watch Noggin while wearing designer clothes.

We've all seen them. The perfect moms at the mall. Wearing beautiful clothes, with perfect hair and makeup. Toting the perfect child behind them obediently. Of course they have the perfect stroller with matching diaper bag, burp cloths, and everything else.

Then there are the moms like myself. In a daze, dragging children behind them apologizing to everyone for their behavior. Most of the time I forget my diaper bag in the car or may have one crinkled diaper and a wet napkin on hand. My K-mart stroller is a mess with chocolate and ice cream smeared all over it.

I'm not knocking those moms out there who are posh and chic. I give them much respect. It must be extremely hard to keep themselves looking so nice while taking care of a little one. I honestly don't know how they can do it. But a little part of me - the evil part - wants to see their perfect child throw up all over their perfect clothes. Just once.