Friday, July 3, 2009

Mediocre Mom

I got to watch 5 minutes of Oprah today. That's all of the allotted tv time I get these days between Hannah Montana and Noggin. I usually only get to tune in just to see the topic I'm going to miss before all of the complaints come rolling in.

Today they were discussing Motherhood. There were two perfect looking moms talking about the demands of motherhood and how so many moms weren't able to meet those demands and how most moms were not happy with their role.

It made me think about the amount of pressure put on moms these days. So many moms try to have the perfect kids and perfect life. They dress them all up and expect them to be angels. They drive them to every lesson known to man and expect them to succeed. They cook perfectly balanced meals and expect their kids to eat them. They make all the crafts, and have playgroups and playtime. They read all the expected books. But they can never achieve perfection. It's not possible.

I'm not out to be the perfect mom and I think if that's your goal, you're going to fail miserably. Those darn little kids get in the way of being able to be a perfect mom. I'm pretty happy with being a half-ass mom. I do the best I can and I laugh at the parts I'm not good at. For example, my cooking skills. I'm also really bad at reminding my kids to brush their teeth. I could go on and on.

My kids aren't going to be dressed perfectly with matching shoes and accessories. They aren't going to act properly all the time. They aren't going to succeed at every sport, or lesson known to man. They probably won't get perfect grades or always have their homework done on time. Lord knows, I'm not always going to be composed. But they will be loved and will know how to love and I think that's the most important thing I can do for them. They will also have a great sense of humor.

I'm glad I didn't get to see the whole hour of Oprah. I would rather let my kids watch too much tv and be a bad, happy mom than listen to the depressed overachievers who have failed at being perfect. My message for you? Strive for being mediocore mom and be happy. You'll be perfect in your kids eyes.


Candy said...

Here here! I'm a half assed Mom sometimes too and more than happy about it. I buy the Gymboree accessories and forget to wear them half the time...I intend to get her to school on time- and fail miserably. I think more moms need to cut themselves some slack and go with my motto "If they're still breathing at the end of the day-- you have been a successful parent. " :)

flavoredmom said...

I cut myself loads of slack. My kids are healthy, happy (when they're not complaining about all the injustices they suffer, like not having a cell phone at age 9, etc.), and entirely too comfortable. A green vegetable has never crossed their pouty little lips; I let them watch too much TV just to keep them out of my hair; and every once in a while they hear me drop an f-bomb. They're still alive and living better than 99% of the world. Most days, they're lucky I don't leave them at a truck stop. I'm a freakin' perfect mother.

Priscilla said...

I can do mediocre :)

Becky said...

The ridiculous thing is that on Oprah just a few days before (I watch my Tivo'd episodes while folding laundry) was a rerun from the "Most Hated Mom in America" - that poor woman who left her baby in the car when she went to work. And the end of the show was all this talk about moms cutting themselves some slack and not trying to be perfect and do it all and have these super-high expectations of ourselves, because that's when mistakes happen and God forbid you make a life-altering mistake like the show's guest.
I'm fine with half-assed... my kids are alive at the end of every day, and sometimes they're even happy. Good enough for me!