Thursday, November 12, 2009

Will I Ever...

I had some deep depressing thoughts while showering today. I'm in a mommy funk.

Will I ever purchase expensive lotions and body scrubs again for myself or will I continue to use Baby Soft products?

Will my husband ever treat me to a new piece of jewelry "just because", with three college funds looming over our heads?

Will I ever be able to head out, on a whim, to catch a movie with friends without planning it three weeks in advance?

Will I ever know what's going on in our country or the world again? All the information in my head seems to be about diaper rash, which decongestants I can give to whom and what time soccer is.

Will I ever know the new top song or even new top groups out other than Disney pop stars?

Will I ever wear a dress again? Or a nightgown? Or heels? Or lipstick? Or jeans that cost more than $20?

Will I ever walk into a department store or book store and not head to the kids section right away?

Will I ever NOT get excited about a new cartoon character shaped Spaghetti-O's or chicken nuggets?

I'm up to my ears in mommyness. I just need to see the light at the end of the long dark tunnel.
I love my kids and appreciate them and know it's a short time in my life that they will be this little. But I'd just like to know it will be over at some point. I will have freedom again and be able to think about myself. Someday. I'm sure then, I'll miss them being so little. The grass is always greener... right?


Susan Fischer said...

I totally hear you!! I feel "dressed up" today because I have on jeans and not a tee shirt ha! We mommies have a thankless tiring job, but that's what makes us awesome. We put up with it with smiles and that can do attitude. We deserve medals :D

Isabella said...

You know... if you can.... pick one thing on your list and go for it. Allow yourslef one thing like one bottle of your favorit lotion and treat yourself. You'll feel better because you count too!! The other stuff won't bother you as much.

Candy said...

You certainly will :) You do have some fabulous new makeup to play with. Next time, we should have "makeovers" and try new stuff. SIgh..if only we could get away with that without our daughters wanting to join us though... back to the whole "mommy-ness", eh?

wasim said...
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