Thursday, April 29, 2010

Cautionary Tale

and when I say "EVER" I mean EVER.
I am the daughter George Hamilton never knew he had.
I have never seen my teeth so white.
I have never seen my skin looking more diseased.
I'm lucky I don't own any suspenders because I would surely be mistaken for an Oompa Loompa.
I love the fact that I can wear pants all the time.
My husband keeps looking away because he says its hard to take me seriously.
All I wanted to be was tan...and Groupon made it possible for such a good price.
Why Groupon??
?? Why have you failed me????
My daughter told me that "you should have a very great artist draw your face and you can glue it onto your face with washable glue until you look regular again."


Lesley said...

you have me in stitches.....I think there has to be a way to not look like a 75 year old resident of Palm Beach...I just haven't the faintest clue how to do it!

Nanny Deprived said...

Awesome! I want pictures posted to facebook.

JMN said...

Hi there! New follower from Top Mommy Bloggers! Hope you'll check my site out too!