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I've been working on this post for awhile now. I just keep adding to it as I say these horrific things. I'm sure everyone has a few of these they can recall.
Things I've Actually Said as a Mommy:
Why are your panties up there and how did you get them up there?
There's no crying in the Jumparoo!
Pee Pee goes in the potty, not on the wall.
I'm pretty sure the dog does not like wearing tutus.
Please just make faces at the baby for 5 minutes so I can get dressed.
Me to stranger: Can you please hold my baby so I can wipe my son's butt?
Keep it up and we'll be at the ER tonight.
Your Pee Pee (penis) is not invited to the dinner table.
Let's stop singing songs about death.
At least you fell on your knee and not your face.
Hurted is not a word.
This is my favorite episode of SpongeBob!
Do you have any "Did I just say that" moments you can recall?
Thursday, February 4, 2010
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10 comments:
So funny i see this post. Um, yea i called my old dentist this week to ask to transfer my FART to me new dentist. I was trying to say CHART. I was about to die.
"Why did you hide daddy's keys in a sock under the computer desk?" I'm a nanny and my little charge put them there because he wouldn't give her a piece of chocolate before dinner.
I'm not a mom, but this post was hilarious. I look forward to seeing more like this one.
"Why do you need to sit on your sister?" comes to mind. And the answer..."Because she likes it."
"We do not drink bath water"
and "Please stop putting yourself on a leash" are two recent favorites of mine...
I loved the "stop singing songs about death"...where did that come from?? LOL.
I loved this post!
OMG! You know I knew there were others out there like me. I just never met one...until now LOL! Funny thing is I raised 4 children while having a nice career. My youngest of 5 (son) was diagnosed as being a "higher functioning autistic child" a couple years ago. Wasn't sure what to do so of course I put my nice paying job to the side and became a WHAM. NEVER in the two years that I've been home have I ever laughed as much as when I read this blog! I swear I almost pee'd my pants! Thanks! I needed that!
During a very long trip (8 hours I think), the boys were fighting in the back of the van. Not sure if they were playing ninja's or just fighting. So tired of it and the trip I called back "If you can't hit your brother nice don't hit him at all." Yeah I know...it was bad.
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